Random Rants Part 2
I will always get in the slowest line and there's nothing I can do about it. Whether it's the checkout in a store, customs at an airport, anything. If there is more than one line, no matter how well I vet each line, I not only get in a slow line, I get in the slowest of them all. Some vetting criteria (which have proven useless) are:
1. Length of the line. A shorter line (assuming there is one) is enticing. It means fewer transactions need to be processed ahead of you and it feels like you're closer to getting thru.
2. Momentum of the line. This one really should work. A line that's moving well should continue to do so. It means the cashier or customs official is efficient and not wasting time.
3. Profiling the line. Who holds up lines the most? The correct answer is the person in front of you. But we want to believe the family with 10 kids is going to be slow showing all their passports and in a retail environment, the woman with 2 shopping carts full might take a while.
So why does none of this work? Why am I always in the slowest line? As with everything else, a very small percentage of people screw things up. It's not that some people are slow, it's that a small handful of people are really really really slow. And you can't predict who it will be, but it will be someone in your line. It's the guy whose passport expired, whose credit card doesn't work, the thing that puts everything on hold and the line stops. And then you start looking at every other line and realizing how fast those lines are going and you hesitate to jump to the back of a line because you are next, but as you discover, it would have been faster to go another line than to have waited for the guy who's trying to explain why he doesn't look like the picture in his passport or the cashier who disappeared for 10 minutes to check the price of a banana.
So what's the answer? The best solution to this problem is that whenever there is more than one cashier or customs agent, there has to be only one line that feeds into all of the checkouts. A lot of places, especially in the US already do that. Checking in baggage at LAX, going thru customs at LAX, many retail stores. It ensures that the retard in front of you won't slow you down. It's the most fair. Everyone waits an equal amount of time, everyone gets thru without any major delays.
It may be a while before those in charge of line logistics read this post, so meanwhile, the best strategy when traveling with at least 1 other person, is that each person in the group should go to a different line and whoever gets to the window first is joined by the rest.
1. Length of the line. A shorter line (assuming there is one) is enticing. It means fewer transactions need to be processed ahead of you and it feels like you're closer to getting thru.
2. Momentum of the line. This one really should work. A line that's moving well should continue to do so. It means the cashier or customs official is efficient and not wasting time.
3. Profiling the line. Who holds up lines the most? The correct answer is the person in front of you. But we want to believe the family with 10 kids is going to be slow showing all their passports and in a retail environment, the woman with 2 shopping carts full might take a while.
So why does none of this work? Why am I always in the slowest line? As with everything else, a very small percentage of people screw things up. It's not that some people are slow, it's that a small handful of people are really really really slow. And you can't predict who it will be, but it will be someone in your line. It's the guy whose passport expired, whose credit card doesn't work, the thing that puts everything on hold and the line stops. And then you start looking at every other line and realizing how fast those lines are going and you hesitate to jump to the back of a line because you are next, but as you discover, it would have been faster to go another line than to have waited for the guy who's trying to explain why he doesn't look like the picture in his passport or the cashier who disappeared for 10 minutes to check the price of a banana.
So what's the answer? The best solution to this problem is that whenever there is more than one cashier or customs agent, there has to be only one line that feeds into all of the checkouts. A lot of places, especially in the US already do that. Checking in baggage at LAX, going thru customs at LAX, many retail stores. It ensures that the retard in front of you won't slow you down. It's the most fair. Everyone waits an equal amount of time, everyone gets thru without any major delays.
It may be a while before those in charge of line logistics read this post, so meanwhile, the best strategy when traveling with at least 1 other person, is that each person in the group should go to a different line and whoever gets to the window first is joined by the rest.
Labels: random
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